Jude Collins

Sunday, 10 January 2010

Oh Doctor, I'm in trouble...

Two little items deserving attention in the papers this morning. It appears that Peter Robinson lost the RUC guard on his house because of his (illegal) incursion with several companions into Clontibret in Co Monaghan. At which point a number of RUC people, voluntarily, mounted guard. Did you know that's what the RUC were up to back then? The second item was the news - delivered in the course of a much-praised article - by Suzanne Breen that she'd been very friendly with Iris Robinson over the years, so much so that her (Ms Breen's) baby was dandled on Iris's knee and that Iris bought it a cute lil present with 'From Auntie Iris' or some such on it. So now I know how journalists maintain their even-keel, objective stance with politicians: they get them to dandle their children and have them referred to as family members. I expect Suzanne, in the interests of balance, has a Sinn Fein MP who dandles with equal fondness and signs himself 'Uncle Whatsit'.

No Robinson jokes! ...OK, just this one, then...

Peter Robinson goes to the doctor. "Dunno what is the matter with me" Peter tells him. "Completely out of sorts". The doctor nods sympathetically and checks his chest, takes a blood sample, finally looks at his eyes and light dawns. "Ah, now I see what your problem is. You've got something in your iris". Ba-boom.

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